5 Years Ago Already!

I met some of the family at their grandmother’s memorial just last weekend. Asking two of the youngest visitors what grade they were in, the younger said third, and the older said eighth. I commented that they were two memorable grades for me and how our third-grade students study local history which I have always found fascinating. The eighth grader commented that she had been in third grade during the pandemic and didn’t have much to say regarding the third-grade curriculum during that tumultuous time. And I thought, FIVE years! How can that be?

It has already been nearly five years since the pandemic shook our world! It was an unbelievable flash on how quickly five years have passed, but also on how life has resumed back to ‘normal’- if there is such a thing- and how we have seemed to readjust to a world with a history darkened by pandemics, plagues, and global threats. Life seems to have returned to this ‘new normal’, with occasional signs of masks in boxes in entry ways and reception desks-test kits in pharmacies and an occasional resurgence of symptoms.

There is no way to circumvent the tremendous pain and loss brought on by this pandemic, as well as the fear that seemed to grip each one of us. Each day when I watched the news, I realized the impending severity by seeing the pandemic climb from a mere mention to the number one news story. Every element of our lives began to shift tremendously as we realized the very precarious balance between life and death- love and loss- plenty and scarcity.

My family and I were vacationing in Florida at the time but had news of my mother-in-law’s failing health, not related to the pandemic. So, we packed up and started our journey home-just in time to say goodbye. Her memorial was held at the local funeral home and I believe it became the last service before everything that could shut down - began to shut down.

I remember the fear of leaving the house- not wanting to be near anyone or touch anything. When able to find an available delivery time- groceries were unloaded into our garage and wiped down before entering the house. My occasional morning walks were eerily quiet and the vacated village took on the appearance of a ghost town. Signs in windows of homes and businesses were thanking our essential workers for putting their own lives at risk to care for their neighbors and their community. It was this new layer or level of fear that I hadn’t experienced before- a new threat that we hadn’t really ever prepared for. Yes, we had been taught to stop-drop-and roll, taught to look both ways before crossing the street, reminded to wash our hands and sneeze into our elbows but never had I considered this global catastrophe. Our psyches were just not equipped or primed for this new threat that didn’t discriminate for age, locale, or financial status. The morning news projected the palpable pain of the loss of millions of lives, friends and family members dying alone, and the rolling thunder of fear across the globe. I think if we all sit a moment, we can still feel it build in our chests-this visceral memory of fear and pain and loss.

Yet, in our small nuclear family of three- we began to hold onto each other a little more tightly. Many daily want to’s or have to’s seemed to fade away as we sat together doing the 500-piece jigsaw puzzle. We took out the board games and huddled by the fireplace recognizing and appreciating our reliance on each other in this uncertain world. We ate all meals together and watched several series on cable TV. Some of the extraneous world’s worries seemed to fade away as our focus redefined home and family and we managed through this new quiet and challenging time. I didn’t really miss grocery shopping or social engagements, meetings or the constant busyness of life- home became a refuge- family time treasured- life precious.

Sympathy abounds for those who suffered and struggled through loss. Gratitude remains for those who put their own lives at risk to help others. I think perhaps this terrible time has become part of our arsenal of survival tactics for life. But I will also hold onto the value of this period when time seemed to stand still, and home became just the best four-letter word ever.